Daddy is so much fun!

Matt is always so impressed by my "creativity" to find things for the kids to do that often he forgets to use his own brain. Well I came home from a lengthy doctor's expecting to find what I usually find when I come home. A spotless house, and the kids and matt either running around,or dancing instead I came home to a semi clean house and a flooded dining room. Matt was so creative he dumped the toys out of one of the kids bins packed it full of snow and hid little prizes throughout. then he got all of asher's play tools and let the kids be arceologists and dig in the snow. They had a blast and it was something fun to do while stuck in the house.

prima ballerina...forget it!

Addie had her very first dance recital yesterday. We were so excited because she loves to dance around the house and when I watch her at her class she always does great. Well I think I fed my baby princess to the wolves because she did not enjoy herself yesterday.

Her class was the first dance and soon as the curtain rose Addie covered her eyes and looked very annoyed. She picked up her little phone and scowled towards her teacher who was trying to get Addie to dance.

By the time the second number came I was hoping that she would be used to the idea and would be able to perform. Well not exactly. The curtain rose and as the ballerina filed onto the stage Addie came out with her head down and proclaimed very loudly, "OH NO NOT AGAIN!!!" Yes she defiantly stole the show with that comment everyone heard her and began laughing. She then stood there with her ears covered for the whole number. She was not happy about the performance but still she was the cutest one up there. She did however enjoy the cookies that were served after the recital and decided she might like dance recitals after all.

Christmas Potluck cake

Last night Matt and I collaborated on a Christmas cake to bring to his work Christmas potluck. I asked him what kind of things were being brought to the potluck expecting some of the traditional Christmas food (mac and cheese, cranberry sauce, ham). Instead I was told hot wings, Adobo, and spaghetti. Yeah, I was making a face like you are probably making now....yuck! Well I said ok I will make a Christmas cake. I have been wanting to make one anyways but didn't wish to consume the calories. I meant to spend a lot of time making a beautiful cake but instead holiday craziness came in the way and I had ended up making it last night. Matt told me how he wanted it to look and also said he wanted a snowman in the middle. I gave him snowman duty and I have to admit he did a great job. I know a snowman seems like an easy thing to make but my husband has the artistic ability of a newborn so I was very impressed by him making the fondant snowman. I did the rest including hand painting the trees and candy canes. Though you can't really tell by the pictures I also used piping gel and some sugar shavings to make it look like the snow man was melting. Though there was a thousand ideas in my head we had limited time. I still think it came out cute.

Snow days

The snow has arrived here in Washington and I have to admit I was really dreading it. Last year was awful because the kids I think were still too young to actually have fun in it. We would spend an hour getting them dressed, 15 minutes of whiny playtime and two hours clean up. I was not enthusiastic at all for snow this year but it came despite my wishes and we actually had a blast. Well Addie only spent about 10 minutes outside then she decided she would rather be inside drinking chocolate milk and watching kung fu panda. Asher however spent about two hours outside with Matt and I, and some friends sledding, and building a fort with the guys. I guess it is time for me to admit it to myself and the world that yes snow can be fun and I enjoyed it. Here are a few pictures of sledding and I will have to take a picture of the huge fort Matt built. I am guessing it may still be there in time for summer. Yes it is that big, so I have time.

New Babysitter?

For Christmas Matt's parents bought our kids this little indoor kids trampoline. It arrived yesterday and Matt and I were too impatient to wait till Christmas to put it together for the kids. Well two and a half hours later.......The kids were finally able to take their first jumps. It was a big hit and we let them jump all night until they poured themselves into bed.

They love jumping so much that there is always at least one of the jumping at all times. It is the perfect toy for a Washington child right now because of the yucky weather. All I know is that this toy is a blessing to my sanity right now during the busy holiday season. Big Thanks to Paw Paw and Grandma from the whole family!

Asher torturing Bean

Asher and our wonderful dog Bean are great friends and partners in crime. Sometimes Asher gets a little to ruff with bean but for the most part they love eachother. The last picture is Asher pouting because Bean ran away from him.

chirstmas pictures

We never got around to taking christmas pictures of the kids so I decided to take them to the mall and take pictures with santa. What kid doesn't love santa right? Well Asher doesn't love santa yet. Addie remember fondly of the gifts he left last year and was excited to see him. She even wanted to bring HIM a present and was mad at me when I told her no. The santa at the mall was great he even showed her a magic trick and now Addie is definantly a believer is santa's magic. Asher only got close enough when santa was looking the other way to steal a candy cane out of the basket. Since Asher opted not to take pictures with santa I took a few of him today in front of the tree. That will have to do for this year.

All Smiles

The kids went to the dentist for the first time yesterday. I was expecting the worse, screaming, crying, kicking, whining, etc. What I didn't expect was the to like it. Yes I said like it. The dental office made it so much fun for them. The each got to pick out their own special toothbrush and prizes for being so well behaved.

Addie has a cavity in the front but we are getting it fixed for her next week. Asher had no cavities but does have an under bite that will have to be corrected with jaw correction and braces when he gets older. The under bite isn't that bad so braces might be enough. Anyways the kids are already asking to go back to the dentist.

Matt's early christmas

Matt has wanted footed pjs since I've known him. I have always thought that was a strange request and laughed it off. Well while "santa" was out shopping on black friday I found footed pjs. Matt was so happy he just about ripped his clothes off so he could wear his pjs. He puts them on as soon as he gets home and wears them constantly. I hope he will let me wash them. He also wants to cut a butt flap out in the back but I have to draw the line somewhere...right?

On a different note thanks for the support of my new blog.

This is ME!

The truth is I don't know me. Well sometimes I do or at least I think I do and then like a slap in the face my mind turns on me and I start travelling in a total different direction. I was recently diagnosed with bipolar I. I actually think of it as someone giving a name to my madness. I am setting up a new blog that is coming from me.

My whole life I have only shown what people wanted me to. I can't help trying to figure out what people want me to say and saying it. I guess I feel that if I always said what I thought I would have been committed a long time ago. Maybe it is just because I hate explaining myself. I hate saying that I am sad and not knowing why. People just don't understand that I can be floating on cloud nine and the next wishing there was a way to kill myself without damaging my husband and kids. I feel like for so many years my mind has tortured me to the point of no return that my true self is locked up screaming to get out by find myself wandering in blackness.

Since my diagnosis I see three psychologists on a weekly basis that try to get my meds right and keeping my from going off the deep end. Sadly the deep end for me is like a wick burning at two ends. I can either go down which is way down not being able to live with myself to way up where I go a period of time in an altered mania the permanently damages all who know me. I take medicine that makes me gain weight and also feel lifeless sometimes and it is often a struggle but then I think of my kids and my wonderful husband and I continue to pop pills that are suppose to make me a better person. I really hope it is working though I am not quite sure.

Well I think that can explain me a little or at least to the point that hopefully you will understand. If you are reading this I guess I am sorry to you that you know me because despite my best efforts I will probably hurt you some kind of way with my mood swings. If you can except me for me and my flaws I thank you so much I really do need you. I sometimes don't want to talk to anyone but it doesn't mean that I am angry I just sometimes feel disconnected.

So here my new blog! I thought I about naming it naked to remind me to stay true to myself and stop trying to mirror what others want but, naked is kind of an inappropriate name being that I will be using this as a family blog so enjoy or not whatever you feel like I won't judge.